CRUEL WHEELS

krūra krūreti cakrūram

Calling out "Cruel Cruel!" they jeered Akrura.

Sri Lalita Madhava - Distraught Radha: - "Become conscious for a moment and look.  What misfortune! Merciless Akrura urges on the horses."

When you go to Gokula it is possible that someone tells you this story ....

I was there,

with sleepless eyes,

could not hold back the sun

so not to rise,

when the tearful whispers

of the night became cries

but I could hear no sound

since my heart lamented

more loud,

but the cruel voice

amid my numbness, rose

                              in an averse prayer    ⁽¹⁾                  

when it urged the horse

to move on,

I swooned,

my bangles, dress, rings

like petals of a withering flower,

loosened and slipped

I was there,

distraught,

that day at dawn

yet I saw not the horizon

but the hooves, the ground

the rims, the spokes of the wheels,

cruelly ready to leave,

my hand outstretched, desperate

to grasp, to pull back, to halt,

...once more ~ to touch...

for I had not enough

of His fragrant embraces

nor of His dancing hips

or His Tulsi-scented chest

and of His tempting hands,

nor of His camphored breath,

nor my eyes had enough

of the piercing love of His glance,

of the sweat streaks

on His sandal-smeared skin,

nor of the sweetness

of His cherry red lips,

nor of His impudent words and tricks

no, no,  I had not enough

of the hidden groves, the secret trysts

            the nights of moon-glow...       ⁽²⁾

but suddenly I was there,

calling out behind His wheels,

the stones, the trees, melted 

flowed with my tears in streams

I slumped in the dust

holding  my unfinished wreath,

fated to never adorn Him.

I was there, stunned,

the cruel wheels started,

distance became unbearably true

I saw the flag, His silhouette    ⁽³⁾

fading in a fog of dust

           "I'll return"           ⁽⁴⁾

resounded as the last note 

from His flute

and still echoes

in my heart, in the groves,

in the eyes I meet on the roads,

it's the only rope of hope

for this

I still unashamedly breathe.

1) SLM (Purnamasi) "... before Akrura mounts his chariot and begins chants auspicious prayers for departure.."

2) Laghu B. Txt 508, 511-512 "Though astonishing Gokula, the essence of Mathura, seems like a limited area, it expands and contracts according to the pastimes of Krsna."

"According to the particular pastimes there is a suitable appearance of various places which can be seen by those participating in the particular pastime and not by the unqualified."

"It is astonishing that at one time these forms of the abodes exist factually without mixing with each other at all."

When Krishna leaves, Vrindavana expands into the separation of Navadvip and later into the ecstasy of meeting after long separation of Kshetra Dham, because there is no meaning to separation in love if it is not followed by meeting, union and separation and in this way the waves of love flow to never ebb, and swell again and again thus increasing eternally.

3) SGS 5.4.37 "As long as the chariot, its flag, or the cloud of dust the running horses made could be seen, the stunned gopis stood like painted pictures on the path.  Then, remembering Lord Krsna's words, they became hopeful."

4) SGS 5.4.35 "Girls, don't cry.  At sunset I will return."

Thief of the Soul

This poem was inspired by the Gopis speaking to Krishna when they met for the Rasa Dance and Krishna disappeared like a thief after stealing their souls. But what really churned the ink were the many slokas in the Bhagavatam and other Bhakti literature that refer to Krishna as a thief. The reader will find few of them after this intro and in the footnotes.

So the conclusion that came to the heart is that the Lord in whatever form He manifests for His devotees, among the sublime qualities He always displays, there is the one of being a thief, since He enters His devotees mind and steals it. " 

SD 10.29.34 Comm. "O king of thieves! We did not come here with any other purpose than to recover the treasure that You stole from us. You have stolen our minds, but unlike other thieves You did not have to make any great endeavor. You did this simply by blowing on Your flute."

Disturbances in Vraja

SD 10.22.34  "These trees fulfill one's desires with their leaves, flowers and fruits, their shade, roots, bark and wood, and also with their fragrance, sap, ashes, pulp and shoots."

This sloka is spoken by Krishna to the cowherd boys.  He is describing the pleasure that the trees give to him for their nature of using their life and qualities to serve others.

"Disturbances in Vraja" is the way Bhaktivinoda Thakura called the anarthas, which are the greatest impediment for the conditioned jiva to enter the spiritual world. The tree of the ego that we have grown in lifetimes of vicious activities carries the leaves of bad qualities and egotistical mind set.  So the devotee by sadhana bhakti with faith, devotion and concentration, should let all these leaves to go and transform the tree of envy, the anchor to material life, into one of the trees that give happiness to Krishna, because everyone's happiness is in Krishna's happiness.  This realization can start the process for clearing the anarthas (or anartha nivrtti).

Ripe and ready

for the transforming wind

of the autumn season,

that clears the sky, the waters    

            and the mind,         ⁽¹⁾

I let go the leaves

from the tree of my ego,

I'll not feel pain

letting go the dead leaves

of arguments and conflicts,

growing instead a soft smile within,

while the emptiness of my heart

rustles and is blown away like a dry leaf.

I will look at untruthfulness,

false pretense, hypocrisy

and desire for superiority,

as brown parched leaves

releasing them with joy

into the purifying gusts

of this wind,

feeling peaceful and free

as the leaves of deception

and conceit

drop from my tree;

without hesitation

I will look into layers

of memory

       from where unwanted results       ⁽²⁾

life after life have sprouted,

and now are yellow stale leaves

ready to be detached from the tree

by this wind of mercy.

My heart will rejoice

when finally Krishna,

seated in my heart,

crushes with His weight

of sweetness

the remaining hard-shelled

acorns of pride, vanity

and the stardom-me

then with consciousness filled

with devotion,

in bliss and relieved

that I, like the tree,

now denuded of envy,

am ready to sprout anew,

and give happiness to Krishna

               with leaves, shoots,             ⁽³⁾

flowers and fruits.

1) SD 10.20.32-33 "... the fall season arrived, when the sky is cloudless, the water clear and wind gentle.

"The autumn season, which regenerated the lotus flowers, also restored the various bodies of water to their original purity, just as the process of devotional service purifies the minds of the fallen yogis when they return to it."

2) Literal translation of the word "anarthas".

3) CC Adi Lila 3.63 " [...]His smiling glance at once drives away all the bereavements of the world, and His very words enliven the auspicious creepers of devotion by expanding their leaves."

RED DUST

- The song of the Pulindi girl of Vraja

SBB Vol.III 7.119 Purport."Seeing the kunkuma on the ground reminded them first of Krishna and then of His intimate affairs with the gopis. Thinking about these things agitated their minds [...] And how were the aborigine women relieved of this agitation?  By picking up the red powder and smearing it on their faces and breasts, which were burning with lust.  Having done this, the Pulindis felt completely satisfied."

SBB III 7.146 Purport " [...]...the aborigine women lacked the assets of knowledge, good birth, good behavior and devotion to God. They were ignorant of their own eternal identities as spirit souls, and because they had never come close enough to Nanda Maharaja's village to see Krsna with their own eyes, they were also ignorant of Krsna's all-attractive beauty.  None the less, in the forest, the aborigine women of Vraja accidentally came in contact with grass and leaves smeared with kunkuma from the bodies of the gopis   [...] even though indirect, it infused them with sublime devotion for Krishna ...[...].  Having had some contact with the gopis, the aborigine women of Vraja all attained a perfection similar to theirs, if not in this life then in the next."

SGS 1.4.56 "When they saw Him, some aborigine girls became tortured with lust."

AKRURA CAME

Lalita Madhava - Act Three "Vrnda : (After remaining silent for a few moments, she exhales hot air and speaks in confusion.)

If Akrura takes Krsna to Mathura, why should I prepare new bowers in the forest?

Why should I attractively prepare flower beds? Why should I make the fragrant creepers bloom out of season?"

SBB Vol.III 5.164 "Somehow or other the wise Akrura, desiring to promote the welfare of the Yadus, took Him from Vraja to Madhupuri as if by force."

IN the CAVERN OF the HEART - Prayers of Mucukunda

Comment by Visvanath Cakravarti Thakura to SB 10.51.29 : "Mucukunda said, "With Your effulgence You dispel the darkness of this mountain cave, and with Your jewel-like knowledge You destroy the darkness of ignorance in my heart."  In Sanskrit, the heart is sometimes metaphorically referred to as guha "cavern" a deep and secret place."

SB 3.29.5 [Devahuti said] "My dear Lord, You are just like the sun, for You illuminate the darkness of the conditional life of the living entities.  Because their eyes of knowledge are not open, they are sleeping eternally in that darkness without Your shelter, and therefore they are falsely engaged by the actions and reactions of their material activities, and they appear to be very fatigued."

I was inspired to write this poem by an article written by my friend and writer HG Vishoka das Prabhu and with whom I found to have an affinity for the pastime of King Mucukunda.
https://vishoka.wordpress.com/2015/03/31/bad-to-the-bone-bugsy-and-bubbles-in-the-sea/.  

Debt of Love

CC Antya Lila 7.43 "The conjugal love of the gopīs is the most exalted devotional service, surpassing all other methods of bhakti. Therefore Lord Krishna is obliged to say, 'My dear gopīs, I cannot repay you. Indeed, I am always indebted to you."

Prema-vilas - Ch 7. Text 126-127  by Srila Nityananda Das

"Feeling separation from Me, Radha and the gopis have given up Their lives.  Now I shall also give up My life for her.  You will see me in that condition, O Lokanath."

Excerpted from Sri Krishna Kathamrita Bindu Issue No134

"With that prema they [gopis] have given up everything. [...] By their love, Krishna's promise was broken. His pormise is -'As someone approaches me I reciprocate accordingly' {Bg 4.11} Krishna never becomes indebted, He always repays his debts. But this promise of his was broken by the gopis, because the gopis do not want anything, how will he repay them?

[...] {Bhag. 10.32.22} "I have become completely indebted to you. I cannot pay you back, because you don't want anything. What shall I do?"

To pay back his debt he became Gaura, assuming the mood of Radharani is crying and feeling acute pangs of separation from Krishna. This is Gaura. [...] As Radharani is crying, crying, crying and drowning herself in this unfathomable ocean of separation, similarly Gaura is burning himself with the fire of separations from Krishna."

Captive of Love

SKS Ch 5 Txt 7 "The wives of the ass-like brahmanas represent people who are subordinate to those with undeveloped faith. Being under the control of the sweetness of Krishna, Who is the Supersoul, they went to the forest and offered themselves to Him." Srila Bhaktivinoda Thakura

Sri Gaura-ganoddesa dipika Text 191 "She who was the wife of the brahmana

who was attached to performing fire sacrifice in Braja has now appeared as Suklambara Brahmacari.  Sri Gauranga begged for and ate rice from him."

This is one of the poems inspired by the continuity between Krishna Lila and Gaura Lila.  The speaker of this poem is one of the Brahmana's wives who later became Suklambara Brahmacari in Gaura Lila. 

Because they all resided on the outskirts of Vraja towards Mathura, along with the other Brahman wives, she had never met Krishna before but only heard about Him and His wonderful activities. 

Krishna, Who always knows His devotees' hearts, arranged for the Gopas to go and beg for some food from the Brahmanas. But the Brahmanas, full of pride about their rituals, their higher varna and false prestige, refused to give them food and forbade their wives as well, to fulfill Krishna's desire. Together with the other wives, she neglected this restriction, and carrying sweets and other preparations, ran into the forest to meet Krishna. After transgressing her relatives' order, she believed in her heart that she would never have to return home again. But Krishna asked her and the others to go back to what she felt was like a prison. When this Lila continued into Gaura Lila, Lord Gauranga went to beg food from her ~ Suklambara Brahmacari. He was now the captive of her love.

Sound ~ 
soaked in the honey of His name

filled my ears

when the boys came,

and the constraints

surrounding my soul,

imposed as duties and roles

crumbled in that moment 

for which I had craved so long.

Since I was first told

about the King of groves,

 my household chores, the hymns

and the reins of kin

dissolved in a longing,

made me indifferent to everything,
and when my heart, 
ensnared among pillars
 of silent loving desires
became finally free,
 no longer muted,
I grasped the sweets,

breads, cakes and creams

and I ran, 
ran into the forest

of my sweetest dreams,

the jars heavy 

with love delights.

The outrage, the restrictions

of faithless relatives,
lapping like shadows at dusk
against my bare feet 
running down a road of no return,

within yet without my heart,

the ribbon-like path

unfurled endlessly ahead of my eyes

like anxious gazelles,

and time crystallized,

when suddenly 
a fragrance of musk

wafted in the air,

and my senses were stunned,

embracing Krsna
as He entered the door of my eyes,
 leaning on his friend
     while He smiled.   

I stood still, astounded ~
sweet was my load of love

 that I placed on the leaves
at his feet,
where I left also my being,
so sour was the way back
with my emptied pots,
salty and silent the tears
in the bitter bite of separation
when I surrendered my dreams
by going back home,
to please with my love Him.

In time, time took away

that imprisonment,

when the Beauteous Cooling Moon
appeared amongst other groves,

and came to my door

begging for food,
now He has become
the captive of my love.

GOPINATH

Another gopi said “ Yes! Let us see, touch, hear and smell Krishna……” Sarartha Darsini 10th Canto pg228

The Gopis met Krishna in Kurukshetra and expressed their trouble hearts in seeing Him dressed like a King, and therefore they tried to remind Him of Vraja because they wanted to attract Him to come back.

Dressed like a King,

encircled in this town by royal kin,

what you hide now 

we have seen ~

your true crown

of flowers, feathers and leaves.

We touched your skin,

smelled the fragrance

in the nocturnal breeze,

when cooling sandal paste 

covered your limbs,

streaked by rolling pearls of sweat

 like scented dew,

the colorful garland on Your chest

crushed against the blue.

We heard you sing to the moon

in the moonlight of that autumn night,

 your flute exhaling your desire;

we heard you cooing

like a cuckoo in the forest of Vraja

after tasting honeyed fruit,

so to attract again to a love tryst, 

your Radha;

we heard your laughs, your jokes

your herding calls

your persuading and your loving words,

we have touched your hands,

and with our faces, your chest,

your feet we placed on our laps,

our earring grazed your earring,

our cheek touched your cheek,

our limbs against your limbs

in a love dance.

We have seen your throne

when you sat on the soft sand

on our shawls, ⁽¹⁾

we know you

as the King of groves,

of lakes, of seasons, 

of the night skies,

of the forest, of dancers, 

of our minds;

We've seen you dressed in pollen,

in cow dung, 

in dust in the light of dusk,

and whirling among the trees,

with the peacocks, 

surrounded by honeybees,

playing in the pastureland,

the air filled with your scent,

and inebriated by mellows of love

on the riverbank.

Lotus among the lotuses

in a night without end,

Your reign is our land

o King of Rasa,

Dwarka is your solitude,

there is no kingdom of love

superior to Vraja.

(1)  Krishna sat twice on the shawls of the Gopis.  The first time just before the Rasa Dance, to which is referring this stanza, but also during the meeting in Kurukshetra where this poem is taking place.  Manohar Das in his book in Bengali "Vaidagdha-vilasa" reports that this Lila of sitting on the Gopis' shawls happened also in Kurukshetra to recall that intimacy. ( this Lila was also mentioned in a seminar of Madhavananda Prabhu on Kurukshetra)